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It's Like Watching The Dumbest Mouse Get Caught In The Worst Mousetrap: The Linzy19 Story: Brought To You By Skittles Steakhouse

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Oh my god, my boyfriend keeps ordering all this weird stuff and putting it on me while he goes out drinking.

What the fuck is this?

Holy shit, this is kind of cool. It's probably not for me though. It's probably something for him.

I guess I'll play like Elden Ring.

What the fuck?

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What is this?

Does it fit? Hold on. Is this like, is this...

How do you beat Elden Ring? Hold on.

No way!

Okay. Sure.

No, hold on.

Hold on. There's no way. It's the same thing at the back.

Oh my god, you gotta be kidding me.

Okay.

I got one hand. I could still beat Mesmer with one hand.

Oh, the TV is in the other room.

Hold on. How does this even fucking work? Oh my god. Oh, what have I done?

Fuck.

Hold on. No, this is cool. No.

This is like an exercise machine. I think I've heard of these actually. You're supposed to maintain tension

and flex until you break out.

Hold on.

Oh.

Didn't he say he was ******** over?

Better housemate.

Hold on. I'll just call him. Hold on.

Wait.

I don't know how to use a phone. I don't think I can. Anyway, what am I...

God. This is ridiculous. Hold on. I'm gonna flex and break out. Hold on.

Come on, channel your inner Brock Sampson.

This is horrible. What am I supposed to do? Do I just like wake?

What do I do?

I could list all the Castlevanias from best to worst. We all know which one goes in the front.

...

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