How many dicks does a gal need?

Huh?

You have Spanish, right?

Yeah.

Okay, stick a finger in your vagina.

Vahina?

Yes.

That's Spanish?

Do you get off that way?

With my finger in my vagina?

Yes.

Every day.

I understand.

So what nice...

Do you ever masturbate?

I do.

Show me how you masturbate.

I have to.

Just for 30 seconds, show me how you masturbate.

30 seconds?

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Can you get yourself off for 30 seconds?

Well, yeah.

Ah!

Oh!

Okay, no, no porn star tricks!

Oh, wow, I didn't think that.

Hey, there's rules.

There are rules and regulations in everything we do.

Oh, bummer.

Okay, I need a finger there.

I need you to please yourself for a second.

Oh, okay.

Okay, and keep talking while you please yourself.

Um, okay.

I can't do both at the same time.

No, I've known you for quite a while.

Uh-huh.

Let's be honest and ****** here.

Okay.

What is the worst sexual experience you've ever had in your life?

Um, the worst sexual experience...

Mm-hmm.

Um, would probably be my sad sorrow threesome.

I hate that story.

What happened?

Well, like, 'cause my boyfriend was really small, not ever-sized, but small.

Mm-hmm.

And, um, he had this very large anaconda-style friend.

...